That is what I have learned with this whole process. This morning I was looking at my blog and still wondering how I could get it out there for others to see. So I tried to search for it and of course came up empty. One site that always comes up is Dog Cancer Blog that I have listed in my helpful links. I decided to leave a comment on there with my blog. As I looked further into the other comments all of sudden I was feeling comforted. Not by the fact that other people are suffering with the same decision we had to make. The idea that we were not alone in it was what was comforting. All that time before Sam died I was searching and searching for someone else who didn't amputate and came up empty. I sincerely felt like we were the only ones not giving our dog a fighting chance. As I have said before, we are at peace with the decisions we made for Sam. We were blessed to have him in our lives for as long as possible. He had a great life.
There are so many comments on the Dog Cancer Blog of people asking how do you know? or what should I do? These questions are the reason I decided to this blog in the first place. I truly hope these people who are looking for answers will find me. I know our situation was only one of millions, but each one is just as heartbreaking as the next. No matter what you decide for your own dog I believe you have to be at peace with it. That's the only way you can go on.
The other thing I am doing this morning is eating waffles for breakfast. Waffles were Sam's favorite breakfast food. We always made sure we had enough to make one more for him in the end. Today I eat my waffles in honor of him. Here's to you pal!
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Our situations are so similar. I was desperately looking for others to talk to about our 9 year old english mastiff. Myself, my husband and children are still sick about the loss of our beautiful puppy. 4 months today actually. I just wanted to be sure we were doing the right thing, and did not want to make the decision of putting her down. It was like she knew, she collapsed at our home, she was 150 lbs, we couldn't lift her so we made a carrier for her to get her in the car. She passed away before we got to the vet. It was so very horrible. I still have all of her medicine and bowls all together in our kitchen. My 12 year old daughter sleeps with her 8 by 10 picture every night. I just can't believe the impact she has had on all of us. We ache for her. I was just sick to my stomach for weeks after. I smiled when you wrote waffles, Angle's favorite were pancakes, I haven't been able to make them since. I am so sorry for your loss. Take Care :)
ReplyDeleteWe just found out today that our 6yo Great Dane, Zoey, has osteosarcoma in her right front (upper) leg. It has been a 2-month-long process in coming to a diagnosis of her pain, as her initial x-rays were normal. The vet re-did x-rays today which showed the beginnings of the tumor; No obvious metastasis to the lungs yet. She has been in obvious pain/discomfort, even when on pain meds, and has not been using the limb at all for the last 2 weeks. As with many of the posts we have read online, we are beside ourselves with the decision in front of us. We don't want to give up on our girl, who still seems to be herself & has the energy for walks/etc. And the vet & others have explained that the surgery takes the pain of the tumor away & the benefits to the dog 'outweigh' the trauma of the surgery (she has already been walking on only 3 limbs anyway!); But we also know there is no way to know how she would fare after the surgery/chemo. I just don't want her to be in pain & she deserves to have some 'normal/happy' days left... I love Zoey, as she was my first 'baby' (we now also have a 1yo son), but I can't say that the financial aspect is also not part of my decision (of course coupled with the prognosis) - my repsonsibility lies first with my child (even if my heart can't make that distinction). Zoey is in otherwise very good health for her age, which makes this decision even harder. And it will be unbearable to see her lose her battle with this disease - whether sooner or later. I am still torn, but I value you sharing your story. Either way, my heart will ache when we lose our girl and I am even sad that my son won't really get to know her as he grows - they would be best buds, I'm sure of it!
ReplyDeleteI came back for another post, because in my haste of pouring over the web last week when we first received the OSA diagnosis, I realized that in my first post I did not tell you how sorry I was to hear about your story with Sam and to thank you for sharing it! I'm sure it is still difficult, as not much time has passed since you said goodbye. After exploring all of the 'options' and doing some soul-searching, we have also decided to not go through with the amputation on Zoey's forelimb. We are trying palliative treatment with medication, and are considering radiation, as her pain is pretty severe (despite her lingering enthusiasm for being outside with us & going for short walks). Thanks again for sharing your story, as you are right in that it was not easy (or common) to find others who have decided to go this route. So sorry again for your loss.
ReplyDeleteMilo, My lab Shepard Mix has osteosacroma in this back leg. We did not amputate and tried k9 immunity. he is almost at 9 months but he is starting to experience pain. I may have to put him down any day your blog gave me comfort
ReplyDeleteLooking at your pictures of Sam is like looking at my own Cocoa! Also a chocolate lab, he was diagnosed 5 months ago, and despite the lump on his leg having grown, he continues to be his regular self. We too, have chosen not to amputate, as he is 11 years old, and feel we want to make his time with us comfortable. So difficult to know when we should take that next step, since he is not showing any real signs of pain, other than his limp. Taking it day by day, and enjoying our time with him is all we can do. Thanks for sharing your story, we are always second guessing ourselves, whether we should have done something else. Sorry for you loss.
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